Brothers and sisters, aloha! It is a pleasure to be with you today. I am grateful for my wife. People ask me how I like serving a mission in paradise. I tell them I’ve been in paradise since I got married. We love Hawaii. We especially love serving at the Visitors’ Center. There is a sacred feeling as we serve on the Temple grounds. I acknowledge the wonderful sister missionaries who serve at the Visitors’ Center. Many of them are in the audience today. These sisters come from many different countries and cultures, yet they have one powerful thing that unites them: their love for Jesus Christ and His restored gospel. We love serving with them. I invite all of you to come to the Visitors’ Center.
I love being on BYU–Hawaii campus – almost as much as I love being on the Temple grounds at the Visitors’ Center. You are an amazing student body! Thank you, President Wheelwright for all that you, the faculty, the administrators, and the support staff are doing to move BYU–Hawaii forward. President, thank you also for this opportunity to speak. I love to be among the youth of the Church. I love your energy, your optimism, your faith. I have heard others say they always feel younger when they spend time with young people. This has always been my experience too.
I have given much thought and prayer and have studied the words of latter-day prophets to help me decide what I could say to you today. I have felt promptings that I should speak on how each of us can truly be happy in our lives. I’ve come to the conclusion that happiness begins by being filled with a thankful heart.
This week, we celebrate a wonderful holiday in the United States – Thanksgiving! I recognize that many of you are from countries other than the United States, so let me explain why we celebrate Thanksgiving in the USA. The first Thanksgiving celebration took place in Plymouth Colony, in present-day Massachusetts, in the year 1621. Settlers had arrived in the country earlier and had endured many hardships. In the fall of 1621, the settlers and Native Americans united to celebrate the harvest. More than 200 years later, President Abraham Lincoln declared the final Thursday in November as a national day of thanksgiving.
The Thanksgiving holiday is a time to give thanks for our many blessings. A traditional Thanksgiving in the United States includes gathering with loved ones and having a meal together. The meal is not limited to but generally includes turkey, dressing, cranberry sauce, potatoes, other vegetables, and pumpkin pie for dessert. This will be our first Thanksgiving in Hawaii, so we are anxious to see if it is celebrated differently here. I also associate Thanksgiving with “over-eating” because everything tastes sooo good! One of the events our family always does is to take time for everyone to tell one thing for which they are grateful. That discussion always brings thoughtful reflections by everyone else and even a tear or two.
I’d like to ask you to reflect on what you are thankful for today?
• How have you been blessed?
• What opportunities or challenges have blessed your life?
• Do your “blessings” have to do with health? School? Family? Friends? The Gospel?
I’m sure your answers are varied but each blessing is important!
We, of all people in the world, have much to be thankful for: knowing that we are created in the image of God and that we are His children and that He loves us; the Restoration of the Gospel of Jesus Christ; our membership in His Church; understanding and applying the Atonement of the Savior in our lives; and that we have a prophet upon the earth today to lead and guide us.
I hope you also count as one of your current blessings the opportunity to attend BYU–Hawaii. This is a unique campus. The leaders of the Church appropriate many tithing dollars to create a physical campus such as this and to provide excellent teachers and administrators—all of which combine to make a sacred, safe place to learn. I hope you are taking the opportunity to be involved in your ward. I encourage you to get involved in clubs, attend the special lectures sponsored by the university or your academic department, and go to the cultural and sporting events. These are all part of your educational experience. You have a very short window of opportunity here at BYU–Hawaii. Soon you will graduate and be gone from campus. Love your time here. Make the most of each learning opportunity so that you will be prepared to serve your fellow men when you leave here.
Think for a moment of someone you know who is truly happy. We’ve all met those who seem to radiate happiness. They seem to smile more than others. They laugh more than others—just being around them makes us happier as well.
What makes them so happy? Is there something we can do to radiate happiness too? I believe there is a relationship between a grateful heart and being happy. What are the keys that will bring happiness into our lives? I have four suggestions that may help.
Open Your Eyes
The first key to being happy is to open your eyes. As you do so, you will recognize there are many blessings in your life. It is a fact of life that the more we see things, the less we notice them. We must open our eyes and pay attention to the good things happening in our life. We must not take these things for granted! Blessings are happening every single day in our life – if we will just take time to notice them.
Our minds have a marvelous capacity to notice the unusual. However, the opposite is true as well: the more we see the things around us – even the beautiful and wonderful things – the more they become invisible to us. That is why we often take for granted the beauties of this world: the flowers, the trees, the birds, the clouds – even those we love. Because we see these things so often, we see them less and less. Those who live in thanksgiving daily, however, have a way of opening their eyes and seeing the wonders and beauties of this world as though seeing them for the first time.
We can see this in the Book of Mormon. Nephi sees things so differently from his brothers Laman and Lemuel. These brothers were on the same journey, in the same sweltering heat, in the same desert wind storms, struggling to get food for their young family, struggling to keep their family moving forward each day, yet they saw things so differently. Nephi – always displayed the “I-will-go-and-do” type attitude while Laman and Lemuel often murmured and complained about what they were required to do. In 1 Nephi 17, you can catch a glimpse of these brothers and their opposite attitudes.
Laman and Lemuel’s view is reflected in these verses: “... we have wandered in the wilderness for these many years; and our women have toiled, being big with child; and they have borne children in the wilderness and suffered all things, save it were death; and it would have been better that they had died before they came out of Jerusalem than to have suffered these afflictions. Behold these many years [8 years camping and hiking] we have suffered in the wilderness, which time we might have enjoyed our possessions and the land of our inheritance; yea, and we might have been happy. ... And after this manner of language did my brethren murmur and complain against us” (1 Nephi 17:20-22).
Murmur and complain? Yeah. We MIGHT have been happy? Wow!
Meanwhile Nephi said, "... we did travel and wade through much affliction in the wilderness; and our women did bear children in the wilderness . And so great were the blessings of the Lord upon us, that while we did live upon raw meat in the wilderness, our women did give plenty of suck for their children, and were strong, yea, even like unto the men; and they began to bear their journeyings without murmurings” (1 Nephi 17:1-2).
Such a different perspective from these brothers. One murmuring and complaining, the other seeing the blessings!
A few years ago, I was going through a difficult time and was weighed down with the challenges I was facing. About that time, my wife and I were reading the General Conference issue of the Ensign and read President Eyring’s talk where he spoke on gratitude and encouraged members to keep a thankful journal. He counseled us to write in the journal each day the blessings that had come into our lives for that day, so we could look back on them and see the Lord’s hand in our lives. I started by making a list of the blessings in my life. My blessings included my wife, our children and their spouses, our grandchildren, my parents and my wife’s parents, my brothers and sisters and their families, my wonderful friends – these were easy to include. Then I recognized the way the Holy Ghost had inspired me about how to help a person I was working with, I was grateful to have a calling in the Church to serve others, I was grateful that I lived close to a temple and could go there often. I was thankful for the fresh clean air to breath, my health, four seasons (winter, spring, summer and fall), our garden with fresh fruits and vegetables, a warm home, prophets on the earth, the Savior, and His Atonement. My “Thankful List” list kept growing. My problem was the things I’d just mentioned were common things, but I wasn’t seeing them! Once I focused on my many, many blessings, life became much easier for me! The problems that weighed me down didn’t go away, but those problems seemed much smaller, and I was able to see things from a different perspective – a perspective founded on gratitude. My whole attitude on life changed. I came to know just how near our Father in Heaven really is and just how much He desired to bless me and my family.
I quote from the hymn “Count Your Blessings”:
“Are you ever burdened with a load of care?
Does the cross seem heavy you are called to bear?
Count your many blessings; ev’ry doubt will fly,
And you will be singing as the days go by.”
(
LDS Hymns, 241)
Counting our blessings and being grateful for them has a positive impact—not just upon our lives but upon the lives of those around us – our family and friends.
President Uchtdorf said, “We sometimes think that being grateful is what we do after our problems are solved, but how terribly shortsighted that is. How much of life do we miss by waiting to see the rainbow before thanking God that there is rain?” (“Grateful in Any Circumstances,” Ensign, May 2014).
Brothers and sisters, we need to recognize the Lord’s hand in our life – every day. We have much to be thankful for. When we open our eyes and truly recognize the blessings coming to us, we will be much happier and live in thanksgiving daily.
Show It!
Once we truly open our eyes and recognize the blessings we have received, then the second key to being happy in our life is to show it! We show our gratitude with our attitude. Yes! Gratitude begins with attitude.
It is difficult to even imagine a resentful person who is grateful or a grateful person who is resentful.
President Gordon B. Hinckley has said, “Absence of gratitude is the mark of the narrow, uneducated mind. It bespeaks a lack of knowledge and the ignorance of self-sufficiency. It expresses itself in ugly egotism and frequently in wanton mischief. ... Where there is appreciation, there is courtesy, there is concern for the rights and property of others. Without it, there is arrogance and evil” (“With All Thy Getting Get Understanding,” Ensign, August 1988).
I believe that many people are unhappy because they have not learned to be grateful. Some people carry the burden of bitterness and resentfulness for many years. Others are unhappy because life didn’t turn out the way they thought it would.
“If only I had money, then I could be happy.”
“If only I were better looking.”
“If only I could get through the semester with A’s.”
“If only I had a car, a college degree, a job, a wife, or if I was a few inches taller, or a few pounds lighter.”
If we will only look around us, there are a thousand reasons for us not to be happy. It is easy to blame our unhappiness on things we lack in life. The problem is the more we focus on the things we don’t have, the unhappier and more resentful we become, and we become ungrateful people and forget about all that we have been given. Attitude is so important.
In the For the Strength of Youth pamphlet, it says, “Live with a spirit of thanksgiving and you will have greater happiness and satisfaction. … Even in your most difficult times, you can find much to be grateful for.”
The Book of Mormon prophet Moroni witnessed the entire destruction of the Nephite nation. He was hunted by the Lamanites. If the Lamanites were to find him, they would have killed him, yet Moroni remained optimistic as he reminded us of the importance of gratitude. He said, “... remember how merciful the Lord hath been unto the children of men, from the creation of Adam even down until the time that ye shall receive these things, and ponder it in your hearts” (Moroni 10:3).
President Thomas S. Monson has taught, “We can lift ourselves, and others as well, when we refuse to remain in the realm of negative thought and cultivate within our hearts an attitude of gratitude. If ingratitude be numbered among the serious sins, then gratitude takes its place among the noblest of virtues” (“An Attitude of Gratitude,” Ensign, May 1992).
A few years ago, I was diagnosed with lung cancer! Cancer is a very scary thing. The doctor informed me that the cancer had attached to one of the lobs of my lung. He was concerned that the cancer might also be attached to the aorta. He recommended immediate surgery. I asked myself a few times, “Why me?” I was serving as a bishop at the time, and I had just retired and was looking forward to some time with my wife, our children, and our grandchildren and to serving another mission. Why was this happening to me? Prior to the surgery, I was given a priesthood blessing by my three sons and son-in-law. It was humbling to hear the words spoken in that blessing, reminding me that the Lord was aware of me and my situation and that I should put my trust in Him. I didn’t know then, or for some time in the future, if I would be healed or not, but I realized I was in the Lord’s hands, and I put my trust in Him. The surgery went well, and my recovery was complete. I testify that I felt the Lord’s hand every step of the way through my surgery and recovery. As you go through trials, you can feel the Lord’s sustaining influence too.
The earth and all of its creations—everything—belongs to God. He has ownership and blesses us with His possessions—even the gift of life. Yet, I sometimes find myself thinking about what I created, what I purchased, or what I own, such as my home, car, food, clothing, and my health. However, in reality, I have created nothing; I own nothing!
King Benjamin clearly understood this principle of God’s ownership and our indebtedness to Him, as he so beautifully explained in the Book of Mormon: “And now, in the first place, he hath created you, and granted unto you your lives, for which ye are indebted unto him. And secondly, he doth require that ye should do as he hath commanded you; for which if ye do, he doth immediately bless you; and therefore he hath paid you. And ye are still indebted unto him, and are, and will be, forever and ever; therefore, of what have ye to boast? (Mosiah 2:23-24).
King Benjamin also said (and I’m paraphrasing) that if we were to muster up all of the thanks and praise we could possibly give, that it would still be insufficient given the multitude of blessings we receive from God. King Benjamin was not saying, “Well, you can’t possibly thank God for what He has given you, so why even try?” On the contrary, I believe he was saying that we ought to do our very best in rendering our heartfelt thanks to Him every day of our lives.
Brothers and sisters, no matter our circumstances, no matter our challenges or trials, there is something in each day to embrace and cherish. Those who live with an attitude of gratitude are usually among the world’s happiest people. As we have an attitude of gratitude, it radiates from us like sunshine and helps lift others and makes them happy as well.
Regularly Offer Prayers of Thanksgiving
This brings me to the third key to being happy: regularly offer a heart-felt prayer of thanksgiving. I emphasize the importance of offering the heart-felt prayer “regularly!” Prayer is a time to talk privately and openly with Heavenly Father. Pour out your heart to Heavenly Father. He loves you. He wants you to talk to Him. You are His precious child. You are created in His image. He truly wants you to be happy! He wants you to return to live with Him again. He wants to bless you now. He said, “This is my work and my glory to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man” (Moses 1:39). That is His greatest desire!
The Bible Dictionary says this about prayer: “The object of prayer is not to change the will of God, but to secure for ourselves and for others blessings that God is already willing to grant, but that are made conditional on our asking for them” (“Prayer,” Bible Dictionary, p. 753)
I’m reminded of the story told of a man working on the roof of his home who suddenly lost his footing and began to slide down the roof, fully expecting to fall to the ground far below. He quickly offered a prayer asking the Lord to help him when his pants caught on a protruding nail on the roof and stopped him quickly. He stopped his pleading with the Lord and said, “Never mind, Lord. I’ve taken care of it myself.” We generally are very good at asking the Lord for help but are not so good in recognizing His help or His blessings and thanking Him for His help. He is helping us more than we often realize.
President Howard W. Hunter said, “If prayer is only a spasmodic cry at the time of crisis, then it is utterly selfish, and we come to think of God as a repairman or a service agency to help us only in our emergencies. We should remember the Most High day and night – always – not only at times when all other assistance has failed and we desperately need help” ( The Teachings of Howard W. Hunter, p. 39).
Brothers and sisters, what help are you seeking in your life? Just as important, what help have you recently received? Prayer is a perfect time to talk to Heavenly Father and to acknowledge His help and to thank Him for all He has done to help us.
President Gordon B. Hinckley taught, “The trouble with most of our prayers is that we give them as if we were picking up the telephone and ordering groceries – we place our order and then hang up. We need to meditate, contemplate, think of what we are praying about and for and then speak to the Lord as one man speaketh to another” ( Teachings of Gordon B. Hinckley, p. 469).
Don’t get up off your knees too quickly. Wait patiently and ponder what He would have you do. Your morning prayer is a time to review what is going to happen in your life today and to seek Heavenly Father’s help. The end of the day is time to report to Heavenly Father about what you accomplished during the day. An important part of both morning and evening prayers is to thank Heavenly Father for all His many blessings that He has given you.
I saw a post on Facebook recently that said, “It’s funny because we ask God to change our situation not knowing He put us in the situation to change us.”
President Ezra Taft Benson said, “There is a tendency for us in our prayers and in our pleadings with the Lord to ask for additional blessings. But sometimes I feel we need to devote more of our prayers to expressions of gratitude and thanksgiving for blessings already received. We enjoy so much.” ( God, Family, Country, p. 199).
I hope you will have a spirit of thanksgiving in all you do and say. Take time to thank Heavenly Father each day for your blessings. As you consistently express gratitude in your prayers, you will be blessed with a spiritual confirmation that Heavenly Father really loves you. He is aware of you. He is there to support you. It will surprise you what the Lord has done.
Look for Opportunities to Serve Others
The fourth key to being happy in your life is to look for opportunities to serve others! As you pray, ask Heavenly Father to guide your footsteps to those in need. We have been taught when you lose yourself in the service of others, you find yourself. In the process of helping others, you quickly forget about your own worries and you come to love those whom you serve. I’ve witnessed missionaries leave their homes and go to places around the world and truly love the people they serve. They see the good in them. They see the Lord’s hand in the lives of the people they serve. They spend time loving, encouraging, and lifting them.
One of our great hymns reminds us of our obligation to serve others:
Because I have been given much, I too must give.
Because of thy great bounty Lord each day I live
I shall divide my gifts from thee, with every brother that I see
Then shall my thanks be thanks indeed.
Because I have been blessed by thy great love, dear Lord.
I'll share thy love again, according to Thy word.
I shall give love to those in need;
I'll show that love by word and deed:
Thus shall my thanks be thanks in deed.
(“Because I Have Been Given Much,”
LDS Hymns, 219)
And how do we render thanks unto God? King Benjamin told us how: “And behold, I tell you these things that ye may learn wisdom; that ye may learn that when ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God” (Mosiah 2:17).
Watch this short video on serving others:
Mormon Channel: “Unselfish Service”
Brothers and sisters, every time we cheer another’s heart, every time we ease another’s burden, every time we lift a weary hand, we show our gratitude to Heavenly Father for all that we have and all that we are.
There are people all around us who are struggling or going through a difficult time – you may be the only person who knows about their struggles and can help them. Sister Linda Burton, General President of the Relief Society, recently spoke on serving others. She said, “First observe, then serve!” ("First Observe, Then Serve" General Conference, October 2012). That is a good motto for each of us.
There are people needing encouragement that only you can give. In the spirit of being grateful for your blessings, reach out and be an angel to someone who needs your help. Ask Heavenly Father in prayer whom you can serve today. The Spirit will guide you to that person. The blessings that come from serving others are among the choicest this earth has to offer!
In closing, I quote our beloved prophet, President Thomas S. Monson. He said, “To express gratitude is gracious and honorable, to enact gratitude is generous and noble, but to live with gratitude ever in our hearts is to touch heaven” (“The Divine Gift of Gratitude,” Ensign, November 2010)
I began my talk today by posing a question for each of you to consider: How can we be happier? I have given you four keys to unlock that happiness in your life. I hope you will ponder these suggestions and see how they might apply in your life.
Brothers and sisters, we are blessed in countless ways. Make this Thanksgiving the very best one so far! Every day is a new day. A new opportunity. Choice blessings are there for us if we live in thanksgiving every day. “He who receiveth all things with thankfulness,” the Lord has promised, “shall be made glorious; and the things of this earth shall be added unto him, even an hundred fold, yea more” (D&C 78:19). Don’t wait to start. Open your eyes, be filled with an attitude of gratitude, regularly give thanks to our Father in Heaven for His many blessings He has poured out upon you, and look for opportunities to serve others. This is my prayer for each of us, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.